Last week, I had the pleasure and thrill of attending an event where Joan Benoit Samuelson was speaking. Joan is a prolific runner who won the first women’s Olympic marathon in Los Angeles in 1985. She also won the Boston marathon twice – once in 1979 (before she graduated college) and again in 1986. She has set many records in her career. Getting to hear her speak and meet here was a highlight for me.

During Joan’s talk, she told a story about how, after having her first child, Nike wanted to shoot photos for a future ad campaign. The tagline of the ad was “There is no finish line.” This tagline struck a cord with me. It is so true! There is no real finish line in life. OK, I guess there is one true finish line – when we leave this earth and pass on to whatever is after.

The idea that there is no finish line changed how I look at a lot of things, and made some things make sense for me. We tend to focus on getting to a certain point – crossing the finish line of a race, our wedding day, the birth of a child, finishing school, reaching a goal weight. All of those things are finish lines, but life continues on after. There are more finish lines to come.

With the start of the new year, I’d like to encourage you to focus on your finish lines, or goals, for the year. But, while you are planning on successfully crossing each one, also think about what is next. Where will your next finish line be? And the one after that? And the one after that?

Many of my clients and friends struggle with the “I know what to do, I just don’t do it” syndrome. We know we should eat “better.”  However, when the waiter brings the dessert menu, or we are bored at home and head for the pantry, we just cannot seem to stop ourselves. I’ll admit that I often deal with this issue, too (as do many of my fellow dietitians).

I encourage you to spend some time thinking about why you do not do what you know you should. Is it fear? Fear of failure? Fear of success? Fear of change? Fear of the unknown? Fear relationships will change? Is it a lack of knowledge? Do you not truly believe you deserve to achieve your goals?

Take a few minutes of quiet time and try to pinpoint the underlying reason. Yes, it is easy to order that dessert and the dessert is yummy. But, if eating that dessert undermines your weight loss or weight maintenance goals why are you doing that? If it is a one-time or occasional choice that is one thing. If it is sabotaging your efforts, that is when you need to determine the deeper why to the behavior.

Once you know the reason you do not do what you know you should, you can work on understanding and addressing the issue. If it is a fear of failure why are you afraid to fail? We learn a lot when we fail. And, I do not know one person who has always succeeded in everything they did. Failure IS an option. Failure is inevitable when we challenge ourselves.

If you have failed in the past, why? Take those reasons and learn from them. Was it a lack of planning? Lack of support from family? Really dig into it and determine what happened. Then take those as lessons learned and plan to succeed this time. Each time something goes wrong, or you feel like you failed, look at the situation and determine what you would do differently next time.

It may take some time to dig down and find the reason why you do not do the thinks you know you should. Do not stop with “dessert tastes good.” Ask yourself, “what else?” and “why do I feel the need to do that?”

Once you have the deeper, underlying reason, then you can begin to address it and you WILL reach your goals.

I went to the gym this morning – New Year’s Eve. There was only a handful of people there. What’s up with that? Isn’t the last workout of the year just as important as the first? Why not end the year on a positive note rather than just being glad it is over?

Let’s take a look back at 2010. What are you most proud of? What did you accomplish? What surprised you? What would you have liked to accomplish but did not? What goal did you not meet?

It is just as important to look at your successes as those things that didn’t work out as well. We tend to focus on the negative. But, looking at what went right, what we did well, allows us to give ourselves credit rather than always looking at what we didn’t do well.  It allows us to feel positive about ourselves and our accomplishments – which helps us accomplish more!

Looking at things you didn’t accomplish, take a minute and think about why. Was it because you didn’t plan to achieve it? Was it because of fear? Or, was the time just not right?

Now that we’ve taken stock of 2010, let’s look forward to 2011. What do you want to accomplish? What are you willing to do to accomplish those goals? I’m not a fan of New Year’s Resolutions. I’m a fan of setting goals any time of the year and planning how you are going to achieve those goals. Don’t set a goal unless you are also going to spend time planning how to achieve the goal and coming up with a reward for when you do achieve it. Otherwise, you are just setting yourself up for failure. Here’s a tool to use:

My goal:

In order to achieve this goal, I’m going to:

1)  _______________ by _________(date)

2) _______________ by _________(date)

3) _______________ by _________(date)

Now, put those tasks and dates on your calendar. Finally, finish the following sentence:

When I achieve this goal, I will _______________________.

It is important to write down your goal, how you are going to get there, and how you will reward yourself. Those who have written goals are much more successful than those who do not.

You can start small – “I will eat breakfast three times this week.” Plan for that, and have a reward of, for example, buying yourself a new book when you’ve achieved it. Then, build on that success by planning another one. Each time you achieve one goal, you build your confidence that you can achieve another.

I wish you a 2011 filled with joy, friendship, love, and success. Now, it is up to you to set, plan for, and achieve your goals!

We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year’s Day. ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce

I was looking for a quote with which to start the new year and this one seemed just right. One of my friends, Tom, used to host the “Annual New Year’s Resolution Bike Ride.” We would meet at his house about 9AM on January 1, ride a few miles (or more), then head back to his house for pancakes and chatting. Unfortunately, Tom moved to Canada and the ride stopped. However, since then I have been using January 1 to set the tone for the new year. I found this quote which explains why I’m usually up early:

Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to. ~Bill Vaughn

Like the “Best-est Gift” at Christmas, I like to start the new year in a way in which I’d like to spend the rest of the year – with a workout and a healthy meal. It is not a resolution really – it is a commitment to myself, my family, and my friends. If I commit to taking care of myself, I’ll be around to enjoy time with them. On that first page of the new book of Opportunity, I like to write in a workout and at least one healthy meal.

What do you want to write on that first page of your book of Opportunity? Have you made any New Year’s Resolutions to write down? Honestly, I’m not a huge fan of “New Year’s Resolutions” unless they are set like true goals. Otherwise, we just set ourselves up for failure. Dictionary.com states that a resolution is “the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, procedure, etc.” Rather than resolving to something, why not commit to it? Commit is to do or perform. Committing to something is a lot stronger of a, um, commitment than resolving to do something – at least the way I read it. It seems harder to not follow through on a commitment than a resolution. Don’t make a commitment lightly – if you are going to make a commitment think it through and think through how you are going to make it a reality. If you really want to make a commitment, take a few minutes and think through the following questions. And, write your commitment down. It could be what you write on the first page(s) of your book of Opportunity. Those who write their commitments and goals down are much more successful in achieving them than those who do not. It also helps if you write the answers to all of these questions down to refer back to later.

Questions for setting a commitment:

1. What is it you are committing to?
2. Why is it important to you to make this commitment?
3. Have you tried this commitment before and not been successful?
4. If so, what caused you to not be successful? How will this time be different?
5. What will you need to do/change to succeed at this commitment? (For example, getting up earlier to workout, planning meals for the week on Sunday.)
6. How will you overcome obstacles that get in your way of achieving this commitment? (Seeking support from spouse/friends.)
7. Are there smaller commitments/goals you can set to help you achieve your overall goal? (For example, if you want to lose 20 pounds, break it into 5 pound increments.)
8. How will you celebrate succeeding at each commitment/goal?

Now that you’ve set yourself up to succeed, mentally make that commitment and read it at least once a day to keep it in your mind. If you are not ready to take the steps to make a whole-hearted commitment, that’s OK. Personally, if I’m not ready to do it, I wait until I am; I’d rather wait until I am ready than do it half-way.

I hope you and yours have a fun and safe New Year’s Eve. I also hope you’ll join me in writing something in your book of Opportunity to setup 2010 to be the best year yet.

I’m really good at setting high expectations and goals for myself, then being disappointed when I don’t reach them.  However, one thing I have learned is to celebrate when I do things right – even if it is something small.  Yeah, small – like choosing to have veggies over chips with my sandwich.

I think we often get caught up in thinking that if we don’t do everything “perfect” then all our hard work doesn’t count.  We want to eat “perfectly” then get upset about having that dessert – regardless of the fact that we ate all our target servings of fruits and vegetables for the day.  Well, rather than focusing on the negative, here’s what I suggest.  When you do something “right,” or something that moves your towards your goal, give yourself a pat on the back.  “I’m proud of myself for eating veggies with my sandwich rather than the Cheetos I really wanted.  Keep up the good work, girl!”  If you do something that doesn’t move you towards your goal, think about why you made that choice and what you would do differently.  Then, don’t dwell on it – move on!  The next time that choice comes up, think about what happened last time and what you said you’d do differently – and DO IT!

Life is too short to continually focus on the negative.  Take some time out and celebrate the positives!

I have a client who has been, do date, my most successful client in reaching his weight loss goals.  He’s made goals, decided the things he wanted to work on and followed the guidance I’ve provided.  What sets him apart from my other clients? His goal setting and tracking.  Every Saturday morning he decides on his goals for the upcoming week and evaluates how he did reaching the goals he set for the current week.  This keeps him focused on where he is going.

I’m a fan of setting goals and putting them in writing.  If it is in writing, then it is real.  However, recently I’ve come upon another way to help you achieve your goals, and it came from an unlikely place – Jerry Seinfeld.  When Jerry Seinfeld was starting out, he had the goal of writing jokes every day.  He kept himself on track and motivated by building a chain – and not breaking the chain.  Here’s how it works. . .

Set a goal for yourself and decide what you have to do to make that goal a reality.  Then, get a calendar that has all the months on a single page and a big marker of your favorite color.  Each day you do the activity that moves you towards your goal, mark a big “X” on that day.  Each day you move towards your goal, you get an “X,” and you build a chain of Xs.  Keep the chain going.  If you miss a day, no X and the chain is broken.

Here’s an example: I’m in school working towards a PhD in Kinesiology.  I have to get a Candidacy paper written.  My goal is to work on a part of that paper each day.  I recently started using a product called toodledo to manage my task list and goals – and link the two.  Every day I do a task working towards getting my Candidacy paper done, I get a link in my chain.  Toodledo actually builds a chain on my goal page.  Not breaking that chain has become an incredibly powerful motivator for me – and even better every day I get closer to reaching my goal.

Interested?  Give it a try for yourself.  You could track it in Outlook with an all day task marked a certain color.  Or, come up with a way to make it work for you.  Want to learn more?  Here’s a description of the discussion with Jerry Seinfeld.

And, remember – Don’t Break The Chain to achieve your goals!

• S = Specific
• M = Measurable
• A = Action-oriented
• R = Realistic
• T = Timely

If the goal is “lose weight” it isn’t a SMART goal (doesn’t really meat any of the SMART guidelines except, maybe, realistic – we’ll presume it is realistic).  Let’s try again: lose 15 pounds.  Still not completely SMART.  One more time: lose 15 pounds by June 1 by working out at least five times a week and reducing my calorie intake by 500 calories per day.  That one is a bit longer, but it is also SMART.

• S = specific: has an amount of weight, due date, and details for working out and calorie intake
• M = measurable: weight, date, number of times to workout and calories to cut are all measurable
• A = action-oriented: the workout goal and calorie amounts are both actions to help achieve success
• R = realistic: we’ll presume all of the items listed are realistic
• T = timely: has a due-date to help with accountability

Second, big goals – like the one above – should also be broken into smaller goals.  These smaller goals help make the big goal achievable.  The smaller goals should also follow the SMART guideline.  Smaller goals can cover any timeframe from a day to a couple of weeks.  Continuing with the previous example, a couple of smaller goals could be:

• Go to bed by 9PM to be able to get enough sleep and get up at 5AM Monday, Tuesday, Thursday and Friday to work out for an hour for the next three weeks.
• Pack lunch and snacks for tomorrow and include choices such as yogurt, fruit and light string cheese.

Both of these smaller goals meet the SMART guidelines.