I write a weekly newsletter primarily about nutrition topics and, on occasion, other things. I’m re-printing last week’s newsletter here because it is an important issue. If you would like to subscribe to my weekly newsletter, go to www.eatingforperformance.com, enter your email in the box, and reply to the confirmation email. The archive can be found here.

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We encounter so many numbers in our daily lives. Speed limits, serving sizes, weight, and . . .clothing sizes. Clothes shopping is one of my least favorite activities. Clothing manufacturers do not make clothes to fit my body. And, different stores and different lines seem to enjoy randomly assigning sizes to clothing. In one store I may be a 6 and in another a 12. And, let’s not even get into talking about shopping for jeans.

I have finally accepted that the number on the tag is just that – a number. Just like the number that shows up on the scale, it does not determine my self worth. It is not like anyone sees that number and knows my size (unless I wear my shirt inside-out, or they work in the clothing industry). When I try on something that does not fit, rather than starting negative self-talk, I tell myself that it was not made for me. If I have to go up a size, I tell myself that that is not cut right for me and, perhaps a larger size may fit better. I also will go up a size to get one part to fit (hips, for example), then have it tailored.

I have also learned that I cannot expect clothes to fit off-the-rack. I have a great tailor who can make all sorts of adjustments. Neckline too low? Take a little out of the shoulders. I’m also curvy, so I almost always have to have the waist taken in on pants and skirts. If I’m not sure if she can alter something, I will buy it and take it to her for her opinion. If she can’t fit it, I take it back.

Even thought I know all of this, clothes shopping is not on the top of my “fun things to do list.” But, I am getting better at it and learning to enjoy it. Next time you step in that dressing room and what you are trying on does not fit, just tell yourself “that size is just a number, and it was not made for me.” Then, decide if you want a different size or if a tailor can fix what is not fitting just right.

John and I were looking for an alternative to oatmeal and wheat-based breakfast cereals.  A friend of mine recommended we try Teff.  She ran across it at Whole Foods.  Teff is a North African grass.  The grain can be ground into flour and used in baking. Teff is kind of like millet or quinoa in terms of cooking.  The Teff we use is a tiny red grain, but I understand it comes in other colors. It is considered high protein – 7 grams -  has 4 grams of fiber and 37 grams of carbohydrates per 1/4 cup dry.  That 1/4 cup dry grain cooks up to just over 1 cup of cooked Teff.  And, that cup of cooked Teff is very filling.  The flavor is different from any other grain I have eaten – hence another reason why it is a good breakfast alternative.

To cook your Teff, bring 1 cup of water to a boil, add the 1/4 cup Teff, cover and simmer for 15 or so minutes – until it is thick and all of the water is absorbed. You will want to stir it occasionally as well. The alternative is to make a big batch and keep it in the fridge for a few days. To reheat, measure out your serving in a bowl (a larger one that gives it room to expand), add a little extra water, cover and cook in a microwave on high for 2 – 3 minutes.  Serve like you would oatmeal.  I used a little butter, brown sugar, and goat milk.

You can find Teff at stores like Whole Foods. I would also suspect that health food stores may carry it. Or, you can order it online. Bob’s Red Mill has both the grain and Teff flour you can use for baking. We haven’t tried baking with it yet, but it is on the list to try.

We all have those times when you just get too busy, too overwhelmed, or too tired to deal with deciding what to have for dinner.  In these instances it is great to have a few “go to” ideas that are quick and easy.  Here are a couple of mine:

• Get a roasted chicken from the grocery store, some pre-packaged greens, some blueberries, maybe some strawberries if they are in season, some pecans, and some low cal balsamic vinegar dressing.  Pull the chicken off the bones, wash and throw the greens, berries, and pecans in a bowl.  Put some chicken on top (keep the rest in the fridge for later).  Drizzle dressing over the top.  Dinner is served!
• The Watermelon Salad I talked about a few weeks ago has been great to have over the summer.  Quick and cool.  No cooking involved.
• I do this one more by feel as far as the mayonnaise and yogurt. Get some cooked chicken, either the roasted chicken from the grocery store or out of the freezer.  Chop it up and put it in a bowl.  Add about 1 tablespoon low cal mayonnaise, 2 – 4 tablespoons of low fat/no fat plain yogurt (enough to bind everything together), a few red grapes sliced in half, some toasted almond slices, 1/2 to 1 teaspoon curry powder, and 1 to 2 tablespoons (to taste really) of Major Grey’s Mango Chutney (found in the Indian section of the grocery).  Mix well. This makes a great curry chicken salad that you can serve on top of greens or in a pita.  I’ve been known to eat it straight out of the container in a pinch.  It will keep for three to four days in the fridge in an airtight container.

Pick a few of your own quick meals and have them in mind for your own “go to” dinners.  This can make for a better choice than ordering a pizza when you can’t think of anything else when someone asks “what’s for dinner?”

You hear all the time that the first step in recovery is to admit you have a problem.  Today, I’m going to admit to a problem.  I’m a food pusher.  There. . . I said it.  I love to cook, particularly to bake.  Give me an excuse, and I’ll be in the kitchen whipping up some cookies, cake, pie, cobbler, etc.  I have family visiting this week and my first inclination was to get in the kitchen and make some yummy baked goods.  However, I know they are watching their weight, and I didn’t want to be one of those people I write about.  This is what caused me to make the realization that I really can be a food pusher.  Now that I admit I have a problem, I can look at it from the food pusher’s point of view.

First, who or what is a food pusher?  It is someone who pushes food on you.  A lot of times, these well meaning people are family or friends.  I know you’ve met them.  The grandmother who makes her special cake when you come to visit and won’t take “no, thank you” for an answer as she offers you your third slice.  That friend who you love who brings in the gumbo for the Super Bowl game and brings you a big bowl over a mound of rice.  We all know these people.

Why do people become food pushers?  For a lot of people food equates to love.  It is a way to show they love you.  The grandmother knows you know she spent time in the kitchen making that cake for you.  It is her time and love in that cake.  And, you know it.  It is also a way to take care of someone else.  What do you do when someone is sick? Take chicken soup. When a friend has lost a loved one? Drop a meal by. Food shows you care. Food shows you are a friend. Food can also be used to buy “favorite” status. We’ve all heard the stories about the grandparents who let their grandchildren fill up on candy when visiting to help ensure they are the “favorite” grandparents.

Now that we know a little about why food pushers do what they do, we can look at ways to counter it. Try to identify the food pusher’s reasoning. If she is doing it to show love, maybe talk to her about doing something together rather than eating. If they are doing it for friendship, talk with them about other ways to show friendship. If all else fails, tell them you are full but will take some to go. Then, either eat it later or throw it away. Better in the trash than on your hips, stomach, legs, or rear end.

If you find you are a food pusher, like me, you can examine why. I was going to do some baking to show that I love my family and give them some special treats. However, when I realized what I was going to do and why, I settled on making healthy meals and lower calorie treats. I think we are all happy with this solution.

Clients often ask for recommendations for bars and other quick, portable, and shelf-stable foods they can keep with them for when they get in a food crunch.  They need something they can throw in a purse, bag, or glove box.  One of my favorite items to keep handy are KIND bars.

KIND bars are whole food packed with nuts, fruits, and other good things.  They are higher in fat than other bars, but that is because they have nuts in them.  Lots of nuts.  Nuts also provide some protein.  Those nuts also mean they are crunchy and take some work to eat.  That extra work can slow you down and allow your body to get signals to you saying it is satisfied.

KIND bars are available at a lot of grocery stores and health food stores.  If you are looking for a portable snack remember to be KIND to yourself.

A lot of my triathlon and running friends are starting training or hitting their peak training amounts for upcoming races.  When people start increasing their training, they seem to hit a point when they are hungry all the time.  Having been there, I can identify.  It is like there is this little voice in your stomach going “feed me, feed me, feed me” constantly.  They need to eat A LOT of food.  Their need to eat A LOT of food can cause problems with spouses and significant others.  This means you need to really talk about your food.  Even if you are not training, but trying to watch your weight, you still need to talk with others who share your household about food.

For example, we have Bill who is training for an Ironman triathlon.  He needs 5,000 calories a day.  His wife Sue is maintaining her weight and needs about 1,800 calories a day.  Bill offers to make dinner one night.  He makes pasta with meat sauce, a salad, and a side of steamed broccoli.  All is good – right?  Right.  Until, Bill portions out the servings.  Not thinking that his wife does not need the same number of calories he needs, he puts equal servings on both plates.  This happens a few nights a week for a few weeks.  Sue notices her clothes are getting a little tight.  Sue steps on the scale.  Sue is not happy with what she sees and starts to figure out what is going on.

Unfortunately, this is a common occurrence.  When I work with athletes on meal plan, I warn them (if they do not live alone) “Your spouse/significant other CANNOT eat the same amount as you.”  Both the athlete and other person have to be very cognizant of what and how much they are eating.

Another food issue among couples is what to eat.  If you and your partner do not like the same foods all the time, it is OK to make two lunches or two dinners.  Each person is responsible for their own food.  John, my husband, and I do this frequently.  That way, we still eat dinner together and are both happy with what we are eating.  But, your partner does not know how to cook?  Why not take a cooking class or two together?

John is starting to ramp up his training for his Ironman.  He needs more food than I do.  Whenever food goes on a plate or in a bowl we either serve ourselves or confirm with the other how much he/she wants.  This keeps us both happy and our waistlines where we want them.  We talk about food a lot, baby. . . . .