We will open the book. Its pages are blank. We are going to put words on them ourselves. The book is called Opportunity and its first chapter is New Year’s Day. ~Edith Lovejoy Pierce

I was looking for a quote with which to start the new year and this one seemed just right. One of my friends, Tom, used to host the “Annual New Year’s Resolution Bike Ride.” We would meet at his house about 9AM on January 1, ride a few miles (or more), then head back to his house for pancakes and chatting. Unfortunately, Tom moved to Canada and the ride stopped. However, since then I have been using January 1 to set the tone for the new year. I found this quote which explains why I’m usually up early:

Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age is when you’re forced to. ~Bill Vaughn

Like the “Best-est Gift” at Christmas, I like to start the new year in a way in which I’d like to spend the rest of the year – with a workout and a healthy meal. It is not a resolution really – it is a commitment to myself, my family, and my friends. If I commit to taking care of myself, I’ll be around to enjoy time with them. On that first page of the new book of Opportunity, I like to write in a workout and at least one healthy meal.

What do you want to write on that first page of your book of Opportunity? Have you made any New Year’s Resolutions to write down? Honestly, I’m not a huge fan of “New Year’s Resolutions” unless they are set like true goals. Otherwise, we just set ourselves up for failure. Dictionary.com states that a resolution is “the act of resolving or determining upon an action or course of action, method, procedure, etc.” Rather than resolving to something, why not commit to it? Commit is to do or perform. Committing to something is a lot stronger of a, um, commitment than resolving to do something – at least the way I read it. It seems harder to not follow through on a commitment than a resolution. Don’t make a commitment lightly – if you are going to make a commitment think it through and think through how you are going to make it a reality. If you really want to make a commitment, take a few minutes and think through the following questions. And, write your commitment down. It could be what you write on the first page(s) of your book of Opportunity. Those who write their commitments and goals down are much more successful in achieving them than those who do not. It also helps if you write the answers to all of these questions down to refer back to later.

Questions for setting a commitment:

1. What is it you are committing to?
2. Why is it important to you to make this commitment?
3. Have you tried this commitment before and not been successful?
4. If so, what caused you to not be successful? How will this time be different?
5. What will you need to do/change to succeed at this commitment? (For example, getting up earlier to workout, planning meals for the week on Sunday.)
6. How will you overcome obstacles that get in your way of achieving this commitment? (Seeking support from spouse/friends.)
7. Are there smaller commitments/goals you can set to help you achieve your overall goal? (For example, if you want to lose 20 pounds, break it into 5 pound increments.)
8. How will you celebrate succeeding at each commitment/goal?

Now that you’ve set yourself up to succeed, mentally make that commitment and read it at least once a day to keep it in your mind. If you are not ready to take the steps to make a whole-hearted commitment, that’s OK. Personally, if I’m not ready to do it, I wait until I am; I’d rather wait until I am ready than do it half-way.

I hope you and yours have a fun and safe New Year’s Eve. I also hope you’ll join me in writing something in your book of Opportunity to setup 2010 to be the best year yet.

Do you ever go gift shopping and come home with gifts for yourself? I think that happens to all of us. A few years ago I started a Christmas tradition that has turned into the “best-est gift ever!”

Every Christmas morning, I give myself the gift of a workout. This can be a run, a walk, or a video workout. Even if it is only 20 or 30 minutes, it always starts my day off in a positive way. The neighborhood is so quiet Christmas morning. Or, kids are out playing with their new toys – it is fun to see their excitement. This gives me time to clear my head for the day and get some endorphins pumping. I also know the rest of the day that I’ve had a workout – that just mentally helps me enjoy my day even more. Sometimes the time alone is what I need. Other times, I enjoy having someone join me. No one can give you the gift of a workout – they can’t do it for you. A workout is something you do, for you! What better gift is there than the gift of taking care of yourself? Now that I think about it, taking care of yourself is not just a gift for you, but for your friends and family.

Want to give yourself the “best-est gift ever?” Plan a workout Christmas morning either alone or with someone special. It can be before or after opening presents. Take the time to enjoy the morning and plan for your day. Be thankful for the day and all of those sharing it with you. Start a tradition of starting the day with a gift to you, from you.

I wish you and yours a happy, fun-filled, and peaceful holiday.

I can’t take credit for today’s newsletter theme – I saw it in a friend’s newsletter (Dr. Jo) that came out last week and asked permission to borrow it. In her newsletter she talked about how we tend to use “should” to scold and beat up on ourselves. Here are some examples:

• I really should get up and workout, but the bed is so warm and I’m so tired I think I’ll sleep in.
• I really should have the carrots, but those cookies look sooooo goooood.
• I should have the salad, but I’ve had a bad day and deserve the porterhouse steak.

All of those statements are just full of scolding and guilt about choosing what you want over what you “should” have. Dictionary.com has one definition of “should” as “must.” If you substitute “must” for “should” in the above statements, the statements become a lot stronger and do not really allow you a choice. Another definition of “should” is “ought” which goes back to filling the statements with guilt about what you “ought” to do but are not.

Dr. Jo goes on to suggest substituting “could” for “should” which makes it a choice and gets rid of the shame and guilt associated with what you want to do vs. what you think you should do. Saying, “I really could get up and workout, but the bed is so warm and I’m so tired, I think I’ll sleep in” does a couple of things. First, you acknowledge you are making a choice about sleeping in. Second, since you are making a choice, it takes away the guilt and shame about making the choice.

In previous newsletters I’ve talked about making choices rather than doing things mindlessly. If you are choosing to do something – or not to do something – then you take responsibility. If you take responsibility, you take control. I find it a lot harder to feel guilty about something when I’ve made an active choice about it.

This is particularly important this time of year when we feel like we “should” do so many things to make it the “perfect holidays.” We tend to “should” ourselves to the point where we cannot enjoy what we do have and do because we feel like we “should” have or have done more. Rather than “should-ing” about your holidays, “could” about them and enjoy what you have and have done. Practicing “could-ing” now can help you make 2010 a “could” year, rather than a “should” year.

Is it just me or does the holiday season seem to be filled with land mines to keeping my nutrition on track?  There are cookie exchange parties, friends’ parties, work parties, etc.  There just seems to be food and drink everywhere I turn.  Does this happen to you, too?  I’ve decided to share a few tips I use during this season to stay on track.

Eat before you are starving. We all tend to get so busy we may actually ignore our body’s hunger signals until we are ready to eat anything and everything in sight.  Every hour or two, stop and ask yourself, “Am I hungy or will I be hungry soon?”  If the answer is ”yes,” then grab a bite.  You can also keep snacks like granola bars and trail mix in your car so you have something quick and available when you do notice you are hungry.

Eat before you go. A lot of holiday parties have buffets of foods and desserts.  Rather than not knowing what will be there and how it was prepared, eat before you go so you do not have to rely on what is served.  Even then, sometimes I have a hard time staying away from the buffet.  What I do in that situation is to position myself as far away from it as possible and keep a beverage in one hand.  Honestly, a vast majority of the time the food on the buffet really doesn’t taste very good.  So, I’ve decided I don’t want to spend my calories on foods that I don’t really enjoy.

Think before you drink. If I’m going to have an alcoholic beverage at a party, I decide ahead of time how much I’ll have.  Then, I’ll alternate between a “beverage” and water.  This helps me stay hydrated and reduce the impact of the “beverages” on my mental state.  Since alcohol tends to loosen my resolve for the buffet (see above), I really try to watch what I drink.

Mentally rehearse. If I’m attending a dinner party, I will mentally rehearse what I’ll do when I get there.  If there are going to be passed appetizers, I’ll see myself declining unless it is something I really, really want (as with buffets, a lot of times the passed appetizers generally don’t taste great).  If the event is at a restaurant, I’ll look at the menu on line or call to see what will be served so I can anticipate what will be there.  Also, I can find out if something is being served to which I’m allergic or intolerant and ask for accommodation.  If it is at a friend’s house, I typically won’t ask what is being served ahead of time, but take a few bites of just about everything.

Make time to exercise. Make time to exercise – even if it is just a 5 minute stretch break or 10 minute walk.  Exercise can help keep my mind straight and help me stay more relaxed so I can enjoy the season.

I hope you have a great holiday season.  I hope it is filled with family, friends, love and joy.