When we do something “good” we typically like to have a reward.  And, many times that reward is food-related.  Often, this reinforcement begins when we are kids.  “You are such a good boy/girl.  Here, have a cookie!”  Many times, the foods that were and are used as rewards are ones that contain fat, sugar and salt.  A chocolate chip cookie has all three of those ingredients – one reason cookies are so yummy.

Seems simple – right?  Well, let’s look at it in more detail.  When you were young, you did something good and got a cookie.  You liked the cookie.  The cookie was tasty.  And, you probably didn’t get cookies often.  Next, you start thinking about how to get a cookie.  You remember “Last time I was good, I got a cookie.  What can I do to get another cookie?”  You find something “good” to do to get the reward, do it and get the cookie.  This behavior has now been reinforced (or strengthened) twice – you did something and got the yummy cookie.  Every time you do something “good” and get a cookie the link between the behavior and the reward (the cookie) gets stronger.  You start anticipating the cookie.  When you think about doing something “good” you immediately start thinking about the cookie – how soft, warm, yummy, sweet that cookie is.  Now, the behavior has an added aspect of anticipation.  The more these behaviors, anticipations, and rewards happen, the more they are reinforced.  Just like any other habit – the more you do it, the stronger that habit becomes.

Now that you are older, you realize that you do no need to reward yourself with food all the time.  However, you still really like those cookies.  How can you break that habit and link between being “good” and the cookie?  There are two key tools you can use to break this association.  The first is to redefine the reward.  Yes, cookies may be yummy, but does a cookie help you maintain or reach your goals?  How do you feel after eating the cookie – immediately after and a little while later?  Do you get a rush then a crash?  Can you stop with just one or do you need two, three or more?  You have to change how you think about the cookie.  For example, you could tell yourself “Yes, the cookie is good, but I know I won’t be satisfied with just one.  Its better not to start.”  Or, “Yes, the cookie is good, but eating it won’t help me reach/maintain my goal weight.”  Find a couple of messages that work for you.

The second tool is to practice strengthening the new behavior.  Just like the old behavior took time to develop and be reinforced, so does a new behavior.  Plan ahead and decide how you will reward yourself with something other than food.  You may want to write it down somewhere or state it publicly.  For example, “When I finish writing that report I don’t want to write, I’ll spend 30 minutes playing a crossword puzzle.”  You are substituting doing the crossword puzzle rather than having a cookie.  Then, when you finish the report, give yourself that reward.  Now, you have reinforced that doing something “good” gives you a different reward.  The key is to plan the situations and rewards you will use so that when the time comes you don’t have to think about it.  You are taking away the choice of having a cookie because you have already told yourself you will work on a crossword puzzle, take a walk, call a friend, or play with your dogs (or what ever you reward is).  Each time you reinforce your “good” behavior with a new reward, you are reinforcing that behavior and weakening the cookie reward.

Yes, this takes some work and a bit of time.  But, the more you practice new rewards, the easier it will become.

Along with learning to eat when I’m hungry, I’m also working on using smaller portion sizes.  Portion sizes have gotten out of control.  Want to know more?  Check out this Portion Distortion quiz – it is quite enlightening.  In addition to portions getting larger, our plates, bowls, cups, glasses, etc. have also gotten larger.  In the 1950′s a juice glass was 4 oz – a serving.  Today, if you go into a restaurant (or even at home) and get a glass of orange juice it will be a minimum of 12 and probably 24 or more ounces of juice.  That is a lot of juice and a lot of calories.

One way we judge the amount of food on our plates is with our eyes.  If you have a normal portion of food on a large plate, you will think “gee, that’s not very much food, I’d better get more” because of what your eyes saw.  One way to adjust to smaller portions is to eat off smaller plates.  Most dinner plates these days are 12 inches.  Try a 9 inch plate – or even your salad plate.  Food is abundant.  If you are still hungry you can always go back for more.

What I’m doing in putting smaller portions on my plate and in my bowl.  The other day I was pouring myself a bowl of cereal.  It was mounded over the top of the bowl.  It was probably three or four servings.  Hum. . . . I put about half back and was still full until just about lunch time.

When you are eating out, be aware that most restaurant entrees are 2+ (sometimes up to 4) of what is considered a “normal” serving.  Make a note of that when the food comes to the table.  Ask for another plate and put what you are going to eat on it, or ask for a to go container and put at least half in there and out of sight.  If you are still hungry when you finish that, you can get a little more from the plate or to go container.  Or, split an entree with someone else.

It may seem odd at first, but getting portions under control is one of the best, fastest and long-term ways to lose or maintain your weight.  And, you have one one of the best portion control tools with you at all times – the palm of your hand.  For protein and starch servings, think the palm of your hand and one inch high.  When you are serving yourself or at a restaurant, you can hold your palm over the food to determine about how many portions are on your plate.  Start by eating one.  Then, if you are still hungry have a little more – but, don’t continue eating just because it is sooooo gooooood.

Another way to get used to smaller portions is to have a smaller portion, then check in with yourself every thirty minutes or so to see if you are hungry yet.  If you are, grab a little more or have a small snack.  Next time, have a little more than you served yourself the last time.  Eventually, you will find a portion size that works for you.

And, remember that that “right” portion size may vary depending on your training.  For example, if you are training for an Ironman as you get closer to the race you will probably be hungry all the time because you are training a lot.  Honor what your body is telling you and have some extra food/fuel.

Next time you sit down to a meal, stop and look at the portion on your plate or in your bowl and ask yourself “if I eat all of that, am I going to be too full?”  Then, try to eat less than you normally would and see what happens.

I’ve been working on paying attention to my body’s hunger signals.  As simple as it sounds, knowing when I’m physically hungry versus bored, tired, sad or just eating because it is that time is a bit of a challenge.  I’m finding that my body isn’t hungry on schedule.  When I think I should eat, I’m not necessarily hungry.

How am I telling when I am really hungry?  I heard some great advice from Bob Seebohar.  Bob said that you can tell you are really hungry when your stomach starts making noises (although this may be too late – you may be too hungry at this point) and/or your thinking starts getting fuzzy.  Another option is to use a hunger scale.  A hunger scale is a 10 point scale.  1 on the scale is when you are beyond hungry – you are about to eat the table.  10 is beyond full – like after finishing Thanksgiving dinner AND dessert.  5 is neutral – not hungry and not full.  You typically want to start eating about 3 or 4 and stop about 6 or 7.

If I think I’m hungry but not sure, I stop and check in with my body and see what I’m feeling.  If I’m really hungry I eat.  If I’m not sure I wait ten or fifteen minutes and re-assess.

Do you know when you are really hungry?  If not, give this a try and see if you can re-connect with your body’s hunger signals.  If you want a full version of a hunger scale, drop me an email and I’ll send it to you.  And, let me know how it goes!

I’ve started reading The End of Overeating by Brian Kessler again.  One topic that got my attention is that the top two emotions people report when eating for emotional reasons rather than physical hunger are sadness and anger.  And, that when we eat for emotional reasons, we reach for food that has provided comfort in the past.  Those foods typically contain three magic ingredients – sugar, fat, and salt.  One of my favorite comfort foods is Chips-A-Hoy.  Looking at the ingredient label, I see sugars listed twice in the chips (sugar and dextrose) and twice in the rest of the ingredients (sugar and high fructose corn syrup) for a total of 11 grams of sugar per serving- almost three teaspoons.  Fat is listed once in the chocolate chips (cocoa butter) and twice in the rest of the ingredients (soybean oil and/or partially hydrogenated cottonseed oil) for a total of 8 grams per serving.  And, salt is listed (110 mg/serving).

Sugar, fat, and salt appear to do a couple of things.  First, when they are together they enhance the flavor and palatability of each other.  Second, they set off certain reactions in our brain to make us remember how good that food is.  When we think about how good that food was, we remember why we ate them (the cue).  For example, I’m sad and I eat some Chips-A-Hoy.  I feel better.  Next time I’m sad, I remember “Hey, last time I was sad I felt better after those Chips-A-Hoy.  I better go get some more Chips-A-Hoy!”  Now, I may experience temporary relief of my sadness from eating the cookies, but then I may feel sad I ate the cookies which then causes me to eat more cookies, and then I feel sad . . . Get the picture? It can setup a downward cycle – with each step in the cycle re-enforcing the last.

This process works just like developing any other habit.  Each time I’m sad and eat Chip-A-Hoy and feel better, I’m reinforcing the response (Chips-A-Hoy) to the cue (sadness).  Over time, the reaction to sadness becomes automatic – “Chips-A-Hoy, here I come!” without even really thinking about it.

This habit-forming eating is true in other areas as well.  For example, when Sam gets home from work, he always grabs some chips and salsa to “hold him over” until dinner.  After a while, it becomes automatic and Sam eats chips and salsa whenever he gets home regardless of if he is actually hungry or not.

The next time you’re heading for the fridge or pantry, stop and ask yourself “am I really hungry?”  If your stomach is growling or if your thinking is a bit fuzzy, then you probably really are hungry.  However, if you are not sure, you might wait a few minutes and spend that time thinking about what is really going on.  Are you eating out of habit or emotions?  If so, and you are not physically hungry, take a few minutes to determine what will make you feel better – without food.  Using food out of habit can be broken just like any other habit.  You just have to be aware of the habit and work to change it.